As it always has, the open road thrust us forward into a night of unforeseen twists and turns. There was a caffeine break near the campus of Bowling Green, a pit stop at an ominous church, and then a spot of confusion when we couldn’t readily locate Carnage Haunted House once we had arrived at our destination in Columbus, Ohio.
Once inside, we discovered a cavernous, technicolored space that seemed to be the remnant of a former bowling alley. After snagging our tickets, we headed for the queue line where I was amused by a low-budget film that mixed live action with stop-motion animation. The plot seemed to be centered around some little, green, clay creatures who menaced the motley crew of protagonists. Also in the queue area lurked a quartet of cretins, highlighted by a burly clown who regaled guests with a series of off-color gallows humor.
The attraction itself was highly detailed, and immersive, and managed to stitch together a cohesive narrative from a variety of rooms. It was impossible to absorb every bit of scenery; the plentiful cast and robust selection of props proved to be a feast for the eyes. Carnage Haunted House was well-constructed, neatly lit, and put me in mind of a hybrid between Exit 13 and the now-defunct Fear Experience.
“How do you empty a truck full of dead babies?”
“With a pitchfork.”
“That’s my boy!”
-A quick exchange between Burly the Clown and myself
