For one night each October, the haunted trail at Deranged is overrun by horror icons and classic monsters. The promotion is part of a series of themed Sundays, a strategy that keeps the show fresh for cast and customers alike.
Inside Star Fall Mall, the white hot Art the Clown enthusiastically mimed his sexual desires…on no less than four occasions. Once free of Covenfield’s commercial mecca, and beyond the glow of GreeNo Industries, the twinkling lights of the Carnival danced in the night air.
But before we could reach the Big Top, we had to enter the underground. So, we descended into the sewers where Pennywise grinned amongst the floaters, he softly greeted us and implored us to stay for a spell. Offer declined, we broke for the Carnival where “Killer Klowns” by The Dickies excited the atmosphere. Suddenly, the pint-sized Shorty popped up from inside a ticket window, armed with those signature, red boxing gloves. Intent on mischief, Shorty chased me down and delivered a flurry of furious jabs!
Deeper into the woods, we graced the gates of Haunted Hills Cemetery, we were fittingly greeted by the Ghost with the Most — Beetlejuice! The silver-tongued specter may lack a pulse, but has never suffered a deficit of words. Beetlejuice quickly offered some lighthearted thoughts on the heavy topic of life and death before we were ushered into a church where we were greeted by a proselytizing werewolf!
Soon, the woods of Deranged were transformed into Slasher City — Freddy Krueger spit pointed profanity, Jason Vorhees stalked the docks near Deja Voodoo, Ghostface wielded his signature blade inside of a degraded gas station.
But the star of this night was neither an 80’s icon nor a 90’s darling. One actress drew inspiration from something much more recent. When we had arrived at Gourdan Family Farm, it was amidst the screaming of a southern belle, who lashed out with jealousy and unhinged rage! Pearl stalked us with an ax, screeched of stardom, and then shared an awkward moment with a scarecrow.
We dashed through the Gourdan Homestead and then passed the barn where we were stalked by Michael Myers! Ole Pale Face commenced his signature, methodical approach, and in a flight of fancy I attempted to disarm evil incarnate with a spot of impromptu twerking! Unamused, the expressionless Myers did not halt his pursuit, rather he raised a single hand and wordlessly made clear how he planned to handle such cheeky hijinks.
Not inclined to feel the wrath of Michael’s cold hand…or anything else for that matter, we beat feet to the edge of the farm. Our night concluded when we were chased off the property by the original chainsaw-wielding maniac, Leatherface!
Deranged has put otherwise humdrum Sundays to good use with a rotating series of themes. Many of the popular characters were well-suited for the occupied areas, and that attention to detail is undoubtedly appreciated by the horror hounds drawn to such an event.
