The Halfway to Halloween: Blood Sacrifice event at Deranged proved, once again, that small to mid-sized attractions can compete in an often cutthroat market. Both Friday and Saturday drew crowds which was precisely how management and the slippery new mayor, Victor Kalloway, had planned it.
I was fortunate to arrive shortly before the box office was set to turn out the lights, and was surprised to see that the defeated and disgraced former mayor, Lumpy Conwell had maintained a presence. Bitter over his loss in last year’s election, the wayward political figure could be found stalking the grounds of Star Fall Mall. He’d be pleased to know that one of his supporters, a rambling, bug-eyed, janitor, greeted me inside of the retro shopping center and spoke lovingly of the former mayor’s accomplishments.
As an actor-driven attraction, Deranged has always featured a handful of standouts, and this visit was no exception. At the ticket booth of the Herp & Derp Brothers’ Circus, I was asked to provide trinkets or spill secrets to a lively clown named Tootz. An odd shakedown to be sure, I haggled with the wide-eyed Tootz and we agreed that a selfie would suffice as payment.
Upon conclusion of the friendly exchange, yours truly strolled the halls of the circus only to be accosted by Tootz once more when she suckered me with a mirror gag and then proceeded to sing an upbeat tune about twins in a voice that can only be described as the lovechild of a strangled frog and lifelong chain smoker.
Once the impromptu performance had concluded, I ventured forth into the whimsical confines of Mr. Sinister’s Dungeon of Terror. Quickly, Mr. Sinister made his presence known and commented on my lone wolf status in a low, breathy, suggestive tone. The sly trickster employed playful innuendo and requested that I stay, but I politely declined the offer.
Other characters of note included a silent ghoul who brandished a bucket of thick viscera, and a churchyard creep who improvised a line about all the fun things made possible with a fresh corpse. I even stumbled upon a dark ceremony headlined by Covensfield Mayor Victor Kalloway!
Always up for hijinks, I informed Kalloway that rumors swirled that the blood in his sacrifice was of the menstrual variety. Animated, Kalloway forcefully dismissed the gossip, labeled me depraved, and finally shouted a topical joke about tariffs.
I continue to be impressed with the tweaks and wrinkles that Deranged has managed to weave into the production over the years — scenes have evolved and actors are free to utilize an array of tools in this spooky sandbox.
Was Kalloway’s blood sacrifice successful? Will former Mayor Lumpy Conwell continue to haunt the halls of Starfall Mall? Can the Gourdan Family Farm persist through harsh temperatures and unfavorable economic conditions?!
All questions to be answered this fall at Deranged.
